Having Weird, Emotionless Thoughts and Feelings

Everyone has the own set of thoughts that run through their head.They are good, bad, weird or even scary. One can end up going crazy over their thoughts because it can become too much. Every since coming back to school and everything with covid, my thoughts are fucked up. Not in a bad way but in something that I can’t explain. I seriously don’t know what’s going on most of time. Maybe it’s stress or maybe I am just so tired and need a break. For me, it’s 100% stressful because I am overworking myself with school and I can’t have any free time because of it.

I over sleep everyday and have missed classes because of it. I would wake up and be so out of it in the morning. That has been going on for a while now and I try to sleep but my sleep cycle is all messed up. I am telling you that it is this year. This year is a curse and it’s not a normal year. This is why I can’t think normally. I am too focus on what is gonna happen next after a tragedy hits. I’m tired now and all I wanna do is sleep for several days or just go into hibernation for some years.

I look and feel like a zombie right now and this feels like the end of the world. I can’t think straight because of covid. I don’t even wanna go anywhere because of it. I know they say you can’t live in fear but I refuse to catch that virus. I need to snap out of this but I can’t let myself because it’s not fair. I am trying to get back to blogging more often because I love expressing my feelings but school just took all of my energy.

Writing feels so good and free. I don’t wanna talk to anyone right now so I can just express my feelings on here. I try not to let it show but I am really tired and stressed. The only thing that put a smile on my face is watching bacteria under the microscope and listening to Lana Del Rey. Funny, I know but I love looking at bacteria and it’s peaceful. I am pretty sure that everyone have had thoughts that they can’t explain. It’s just something that happens when you are over stressed and you need to relax. I need to relax as well because stress is a killer.

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